Sunday, February 27, 2011

Hear me out

It has to happen. It has to. How can I finish this beautiful story if it doesn't? Promise that you'll give me a good story.

I'm tired of school work...I just want to sit on my couch every night with a glass of wine writing free spirited poems. Why does the world have to be so technical?

Monday, February 21, 2011


Fall in love...
fall in love...
on your own
fall in love...
on a Monday
fall in love...
driving down a one way
fall in love...
in the dark
fall in love...
lost in the park
fall in love...
in your mind

fall in love...
one step behind
fall in love...
not just on a Monday
fall in love...
fall in love...
fall in love...
oh hell, every day
fall in love...
on your last breath
fall in love...
when there's nothing left
fall in love...
with yourself
fall in love...
to fall out of it

Wednesday, February 16, 2011


This is nothing but trouble
It duplicates
It's double trouble
The kind of trouble I get myself into
Trouble so deep, I can't explain me and I can't explain you
Friends shake their heads
I let you rip my heart to shreds
Sober and elated
This trouble is overrated
Relinquish your control
Let me rule my own soul
It's a no go
Trouble is all I know
Sometimes I rebel...
against a battle
with your spell...
Lost in hide and seek
Trouble finds me weak
Walk, sprint, run
I must retreat
Trouble, I despise
Trouble, I love
so bittersweet
To feel this way
Sad to say...
I haven't had enough just yet

You're the best trouble I've ever met.

Friday, February 11, 2011

If Cher believes, I believe

Take my words, take my wishes...I beg of you, the great divine power above me. I have no resistance. I'm losing existence. If I was a singer, I wouldn't make it through the first verse. Listening to A Fine Frenzy only makes this worse. If you were me, what would you do? You're not me, and you don't want to be. Should've of known my love would be returned to me. For the thirteenth time. You'd think I'd get it by now. So, watch me car wrapped around me, tears that leave scars...what I never tell, you'll never know. Never got what I wanted, never broke through...I'm starting to think, no, I'm starting to believe, maybe I'm too good for you.

So, all I have to say about that: If you can't break through, walk around to the other side. Life goes full circle.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

At the edge of the ocean...

Sade softly serenades me in the background as I lay here, on my stomach, nibbling on a Kent State pen. Thoughts of paying bills, meeting deadlines and working swirl through my mind like a fast current, pulling me closer towards the undertow. Worries so deep that not even Dido, Sade or Jill Scott would be able to cure. Watching "Friends" Season 8 where Rachel discovers that she is carrying Ross's baby has an incredible skill of distracting me for a half hour, sometimes longer. Once my hand meets the remote and I power down, my responsibilities still remain, hovering over my shoulders like a 10 year old in love with piggy back rides. I'm so worried about by story for the second issue. Personally, I don't think it has enough momentum but I am going to do whatever it takes to make this story work. I have a lab report due at 11am and don't have the actual lab because I ripped the pages out last semester then dropped the lab like an idiot. I have to work tomorrow at 4pm, at the same place I've been for almost 2 years now. As a server, the times, shoots at you like it's coming full speed out of a canon, but it's not always guaranteed. I'm ready for the next phase of my life, such as, having a career. Servers work extremely long, demanding hours, compromising holidays and birthdays. If you have never served or bar-tended before, I suggest you try it. Definitely one of the toughest, under-appreciated jobs out there. Why haven't I quit? Why haven't I taken out a loan to live off of? I'm not a quitter. I don't want to burn bridges. I'll keep a job for as long as I need it. I worked at my last job for three years and leaving was a very difficult decision for me to make in the year of 2010. In the long run, I know that it was the right decision. Looks like I'm just up late, rambling on my blog. What else is new? Guess it's time to close my laptop down, pour myself a glass of V8 splash and fall asleep to Friends. Until we meet again...

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Rocky start to a long semester

At 3:21 AM on a Monday night, technially Tuesday morning, I finally completed my assignments due for my two online classes. Perhaps working 40 plus hours a week coupled with taking 6 classes would be the proper result of a person lingering on their computer late at night. Well, maybe a just a tad of facebook surfing could be another possible cause. Nevertheless, words can't even begin to describe the frustration and anxiety I feel coming into the third week of Spring semester at Cleveland State University. After five years of college, I'll finally be graduating this coming May with my bachelors in Journalism and Promotional Communication. Each day of my life is filled with a slew responsibilites, both personally and professionally. Being in Lab Newspaper 426 last semester left me flustered, confused and completely stressed out. However, all of those emotions were well worth the amount of knowledge I attained in 426. This semester in 427, I'm still very nervous, but it's working different nerves this time around. In 427, there are more responsibilities as far as designing a page, putting stories online...the list continues. Just the thought makes my head spin almost to the point where it could actually pop right off of my neck. I strive to be more efficient and work much harder than I did last semester. I've made plenty of mistakes and will continue to do so but I'm learning not to let every minor issue get the best of me. Looking like a moron and asking questions you fear will raise eyebrows probably will be inevitable, but this is all a part of life. I covered my first story of the semester on Black History Month. Do I consider this article to be a good one? Eh, it was alright. I feel like I yet to hit my peak. Time will tell.